Brandon Clements

This Wednesday, Apple introduced the newest shiny thing to their indomitable repertoire, and like millions of others, my breath quickened skimming through the live blogs explaining every update.

And I wouldn’t even consider myself a junkie–I don’t own every Apple product, and I didn’t help crash Apple’s website by ordering an iPhone 5 Wednesday night at midnight. I’m due for an upgrade so I may get one eventually, but not anytime soon.

But that does not change the fact that I am, it seems, inexorably hexed by the techie firm from California. I oohed at the new features, even though nothing was earth-shattering.

But the thing that really made me realize my hex was not my desire for the new shiny Apple product, it was my disdain for anything else.

You see, as I was reading about the new iPhone, I came across articles wondering if Apple is losing their touch, putting forth interesting evidence that, at least empirically, the iPhone may not be the most powerful or noteworthy smartphone on the planet anymore.

And do you know what my response to that was?

“Pfffffffftttttttt. RIGHT…”

And then I realized something. It wouldn’t matter if ten of the world’s leading technology experts sat down in front of me with the iPhone 5 and Smartphone X beside each other, then proceeded to systematically demonstrate how Smartphone X is better, faster, cooler, and more intelligent than the iPhone.

No matter what they showed me, I frankly don’t think I would believe them. And if I did begin to believe them, I still think I would wholeheartedly not care. Not want Smartphone X. Still have so much trust in Apple that even if they were beaten by another, they would not stay beaten.

So, I’m wondering…how did this happen? Do the Apple-ites from Cupertino have some sort of mind potion they are releasing from the chips in our iPhones? How did they manage to put such a powerful hex on me?

I really don’t know. But hexed I am.

What about you? Do you feel the same Apple hex I’m describing, or are you a defecter? (Or could you not possibly care less?)